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Wednesday, September 30, 2009

First Working Day..how is it going to be?

Tommorow is going to be my first day working since last studying. I get really nervous as i was not interviewed but said to be accepted by the recommendation from my lecturers from the university. MashaAllah.. their trust made me nervous that i'm afraid i couldnt achieve their standard or expectation.

Oh Allah i seek peace and calm in myself. And hope blessing from u to give me the best working environment and workmates. I hope your easiness for them to accept me and let me learn by time.

Alhamdulillah i am truely so thankful that u are too kind to grant me rezki and jobs that i applied for very soon and that is really unexpected. thank you Allah. Thank you Allah....

How much i deeply see, that ALlah is loving me. I hope i could give more than what He Allah ever granted. Subhanallah. May Allah be with me.

Love,
me-

Monday, September 28, 2009

:)

soon as u grow up...u'll know how much i love u.



Love,
me-

Sakinah please come...

Lately, i have been in a intermediate mood, being too talkative, and sometimes too reserved,quiet. As people around me doesnt seem to understand who i really am, a very sensitive person towards a certain thing to life. What i need is just respect and understanding. Everyone has their own weaknesses, that they cant get to change(due to scientific reason and not a purposed habit).

I love peace. I love calm. I love politeness n manners. Cant they understand? that i hated war and quarrels. I do not like to talk in a rude manner. I do not like to speak in a very high tone. I dislike to feel unhappy with people around me. I dislike arguements and makes myself looks rude. So i need everyone to just accept me for who i am. I'm just a straight forward person, i dont talk much at others weaknesses but try to accept them totally for who they are. I am easy to forgive. So please, I need some peace in mind.


I need people to respect me the way i respected them.
I need people to try to understand me the way i try my best to understand them.
I need to be loved the way i loved them.
I need to be trusted the way i trusted them.
I need people to accept me the way i accepted every single one of them
I mean it....that

I LOVE PEACE (sakinah)

...because i know, Sakinah ( my third name is there)

So please dont break my heart by pointing towards me and make me mad.
Anything that disgrace me, is something that disrespect me.
Anything that makes me sad, is something that really tears me apart

Cant take it especialy if it came from the very own family. T-T

Please do understand.


Love,
me-

Friday, September 25, 2009

The Climb.

I just read someone posted, "If the miracles are about to happen between us again, then i am not going to let it go again." Oh Allah! it makes me shed into tears. How i longed to feel this way. I've been saving much into myself. I've been too resevered these days.

Browsing through the picture i have, found one of him and me together during archifest after my violin performance last year's archifest. I see the face. I see the smile. I see the face and strength to come even how far the distance seperates us.

I am just thinking, and believing, that the smile i see isn't fake. The face i see is true. And so the heart that came there, with one purpose, to meet me, to spend time together. I know he's sincere, he's pure. I can feel it.

BUT....

was it that easy to forget? is it that easy to deny?or is it just me who feels that its real and alive?or was it just me who still think that it's always true.was it me who gets cheated easily. HOW CAN A WARMTH BEGINNING END SO COLD..... T-T

I missed.truely missed. where's the junction that we went wrong...and please Allah i pray to you to give us another chance to make it right. Not to worry. Dont get me wrong.I have no regret but i thank god with this distance You are giving us Allah. I'm getting stronger since that day we went apart. Its just that i missed the other part of me left with him. Some portion of the heart is still out there,unreachable, deactivated. Oh Allah, i pray please protect the other part of me. I loved him so much that i need him to be safe duniya akhirah. I'm unappropraite for him now but i know you Allah is always there to guide him. I feel safe as long as you are there, with him guiding, Please Allah choose him among the person you blessed. And please give the best for me. I know we did too many wrongs, but Allah please forgive us...we really need your blessing for a better beginning and hope.



The Climb By Miley Cyrus

I can almost see it.

That dream I'm dreaming, but
There's a voice inside my head saying
You'll never reach it
Every step I'm takin'
Every move I make
Feels lost with no direction,
My faith is shakin'
But I gotta keep tryin'
Gotta keep my head held high

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waitin' on the other side
It's the climb

The struggles I'm facing
The chances I'm taking
Sometimes might knock me down, but
No I'm not breaking
I may not know it, but
These are the moments that
I'm gonna remember most
I've just gotta keep goin', and
I gotta be strong
Just keep pushing on, but

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waitin' on the other side
It's the climb

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waitin' on the other side
It's the climb

Keep on movin'
Keep climbin'
Keep faith baby
It's all about, it's all about
The climb
Keep the faith, keep your faith, woah

I have to be strong. I have to keep reminding my self as i'm prone to easily forget. I have to keep on praying.And keep faith high. Allah is watching. Allah is hearing. Allah is always there dear. May peace be with you. InshaAllah. Ameen. T-T

Love,
me-

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Light Our Way...

i've been discussing with a friend when he posted a phrase :

Jika mereka berpaling (dari keimanan), maka katakanlah: "Cukuplah Allah bagiku; tidak ada Tuhan selain Dia. Hanya kepada-Nya aku bertawakal dan Dia adalah Tuhan yang memiliki Arasy yang agung" ayat akhir at-taubah..129.. fa'in tawalla...u faqul hasbiAllahu laaillahillahu.. alaihitawakaltu..wahuarabbul arshil adzim...


so i asked,(eventhough i might now the answer)...:
rasa org yg berpaling ni if kita doa utk dia ALlah makbulkan tak? i mean kite doakan moga ALlah tunjuki dia jln yg benar dan pulang kpd keadaan asal?

1st Answer:
Tak ada manusia yang lebih baik dari manusia yang lain.
Cuma ada manusia yang silap. Dan manusia yang sedar diri hanya Hamba Allah SWT. Semua boleh bertukar dgn hendakNya.
Kita, berusaha. InsyaAllah.

2nd Answer:
“Ad pn doa seorg Muslim bi sdaranya yg x hdir adlh mustjab. Di sisi kplanya ad malaikat yg dwkilkan.tiap kali dia mndoakn kbaikn bg sdaranya itu, malaikat yg dwkilkan itu pula brkta: “Amin, dan bgimu seumpma apa yg kau doakn itu. -hadis rwyat muslim

3rd Answer:
islam menganjurkan supaya umatnya saling doa mendoakan antara satu sama lain..
“Dan orang-orang (Islam) yang datang kemudian daripada mereka (berdoa dengan) berkata: “Wahai Tuhan kami! Ampunkanlah dosa kami dan dosa saudara-saudara kami yang mendahului kami dalam iman.al-Hasyr: ayat 10

Subhanallah! Peace and hapiness to those who tries to find love within u Ar-Raheem. Please do accept our duas ALlah thus we only have duas n prayers as weapons. Allah is sufficient enough for us. Allah is strong enough for us. Allah is enough for us. Protect our friends among who loves to be with you Allah.Light their way always with nur hidayaah,so they, inshaALlah could be the example among us,the muslims. InshaAllah.ameen.


PS: Oh Allah please show him the correct path,choose him to be among the person u protect and love.Ameen.

Love,
me-

Saturday, September 5, 2009

Heart Of A Muslim by Zain Bikha ^-^

HEART OF A MUSLIM by Zain Bikha ^-^


Looking up at the sky,
searching for Allah most High
He rejected the way of worshipping Gods of clay
Prophet Ebrahim knew that Allah was near
And that the heart of a Muslim is sincere

Under the hot burning sun, he declared God is one
Though with stones on his chest,
his Imaan would not rest
The Muadhin knew that right would conquer wrong
And the heart of a Muslim must be strong

Chorus:
It’s the heart of a Muslim through
the guidance of Islam
That makes you fair and kind and
helpful to your fellow man
So living as a Muslim means that
you must play a part
Allah looks not at how you look
but what is in your heart

In our poor meager state, little food on our plate
Mother said she was glad
always sharing what we had
When I asked how can we share what’s not enough
She said the heart of a Muslim’s filled with love

He said its time you should know
you will learn as you grow
That some people around will do what’s bad to bring you down
Father said to be a star that’s shining bright
For the heart of a Muslim does what’s right

So whatever you, make sure your words are true
Honesty is the best, because life is a test
Even if it hurts so much you want to cry
For the heart of a Muslim does not lie

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Song In My Head..

Yesterday a friend of mine posted a phrase at his facebook status.
"Oh I don't believe it, That I could be so deceiving, And bringing you down to feel this lack of loyalty...You were a song in my head,.."

The title is Song In My Head by Sherwood

Oh I don't believe it,
That I could be so deceiving
And bringing you down to feel this lack of loyalty.

You were a song in my head,
The warmth of the sheets in my bed.
A story forever told, but never old,
A warm arrival never left so cold.

Don't blink, don't close your eyes,
But most of all don't apologize.
It's me who's got the demons to wrestle now.

Oh I don't believe it,
That I could be so deceiving
And bringing you down to feel this lack of loyalty.

'Cause you were a song in my head,
The warmth of the sheets in my bed.
A story forever told, but never old,
A warm arrival never left so cold.

Don't blink, don't close your eyes,
But most of all don't apologize.
It's me who's got the demons to wrestle now.

There's a patch of blue in the stormy sky,
A memory of a brighter time.
When everything was new, and less watered down,
Before the summer turned to brown.

Don't say you can't believe it now,
That you're almost settled down,
'Cause you'll be right here,
When I come back around.

Don't blink, don't close your eyes,
But most of all don't apologize.
It's me who's got the demons to wrestle now.

There's a patch of blue in the stormy sky,
A memory of a brighter time,
When everything was new, and less watered down,
Before the summer turned to brown.

Before the summer turned to brown
(Don't blink, don't close your eyes)
Before the summer turned to brown
(Don't blink, don't close your eyes)
Before the summer turned to brown
(Don't blink, don't close your eyes)

The phrase captured me as i thought, will the person i'm waiting for will come back and say so? It is really meaningful as in,the guy is declaring her existance, by saying she's was the song in his head after everything he ruined. Actually it doesnt matter how ruined the situation is, but how we try to make it better after the storm.
Don't say you can't believe it now,
That you're almost settled down,
'Cause you'll be right here,
When I come back around.



I'm thinking, how fast is it to forget someone? How can certain people could just forget within a few days while i took more than 8 months to try to forget but it doesnt still seem to work. Oh Allah, may patience be with me!

This song really reminds me to him. I just hope its he the one who dedicate this song to me after what happened.
There's a patch of blue in the stormy sky,
A memory of a brighter time.

I hope he could see how we could try to make things better instead of letting it just die with cruel ending.
A warm arrival never left so cold. remember?

Its time for him to wrestle the demon
..that he kept on mentioning about the 'mask'. Its his path to choose by himself,without any other factors influencing him. The task should only between him and Allah the most Trustful.

Ramadhan kareem. The most lovable months. The months for duas and prayers and hopes.
Do miracle really exist and if so i'd like to see it and feel it. A miracle i've been waiting and wanting. Only Allah knows what's inside the heart..
'Katakanlah," Jika kamu menyembunyikan apa yg ada dlm hatimu atau kamu melahirkannya, pasti Allah mengetahui". Allah mengetahui apa-apa yg ada di langit dan apa-apa yg ada di bumi. dan Allah Maha Kuasa atas setiap sesuatu. (Ali 'Imran ; 29)

With Love and Duas,
me