Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Who are they?

Siapakah orang yang sombong?

Orang yang sombong adalah orang yang di beri penghidupan tapi tidak mahu sujud pada yang menjadikan kehidupan itu iaitu Allah Rabbul Alaamin, Tuhan sekelian alam. Maka bertasbihlah segala apa yang ada di bumi dan langit pada TuhanNya kecuali jin dan manusia yang sombong diri.

Siapakah orang yang telah mati hatinya?

Orang yang telah mati hatinya adalah orang yang diberi petunjuk melalui ayat-ayat Qur'an, Hadith dan cerita2 kebaikan namun merasa tidak ada apa2 kesan di dalam jiwa untuk bertaubat.

Siapakah orang dunggu kepala otaknya?

Orang yang dunggu kepala otaknya adalah orang yang tidak mahu lakukan ibadat tapi menyangka bahawa Tuhan tidak akan menyiksanya! dengan kelalaiannya itu dan sering merasa tenang dengan kemaksiatannya.

Siapakah orang yang kuat?

Orang yang kuat adalah orang yang dapat menahan kemarahannya ketika ia didalam kemarahan.

Siapakah orang yang lemah?

Orang yang lemah adalah orang yang melihat akan kemaksiatan di depan matanya tidak sedikit pun ada kebencian di dalam hatinya akan kemungkaran itu.

Siapakah orang yang bakhil?

Orang yang bakhil lagi kedekut adalah orang yang berat lidahnya untuk membaca selawat keatas junjungan Rasulullah s.a.w.

Siapakah orang yang buta?

Orang yang buta adalah orang yang tidak mahu membaca dan meneliti akan kebesaran Al Qur'an dan tidak mahu mengambil pelajaran daripadanya.

Siapakah orang yang tuli?

Orang yang tuli adalah orang yang di beri nasihat dan pengajaran yang baik namun tidak

Siapakah orang yang sibuk?

Orang yang sibuk adalah orang yang tidak mengambil berat akan waktu solatnya seolah-olah ia mempunyai kerajaan seperti kerajaan Nabi Sulaiman a.s.

Siapakah orang yang manis senyumanya?

Orang yang mempunyai senyuman yang manis adalah orang yang di timpa musibah lalu dia kata "Inna lillahi wainna illaihi rajiuun." Lalu sambil berkata,"Ya Rabbi Aku redha dengan ketentuanMu ini", sambil
mengukir senyuman.

Siapakah orang yang menangis airmata mutiara?

Orang yang menangis airmata mutiara adalah orang-orang yang sedang bersendiri lalu mengingat akan kebesaran Tuhan dan menyesal akan dosa-dosanya lalu mengalir airmatanya.

Siapakah orang yang kaya?

Orang yang kaya adalah orang yang bersyukur dengan apa yang ada dan tidak loba akan kenikmatan dunia yang sementara ini.

Siapakah orang yang miskin?

Orang yang miskin adalah orang tidak puas dengan nikmat yang ada sentiasa menumpuk-numpukkan harta.

Siapakah orang yang pandai?

Orang yang pandai adalah orang yang bersiap siap untuk hari kematiannya kerana dunia ini berusia pendek sedang akhirat kekal abadi

Siapakah orang yang bodoh?

Orang yang bodoh adalah orang yang beriya-iya berusaha sekuat tenaga untuk dunianya sedangkan akhiratnya diabaikan.

Siapakah orang yang maju dalam hidupnya?

Orang yang maju dalam hidupnya adalah orang-orang yang senantiasa mempertingkat ilmu agamanya.

Siapa kah orang-orang yang mundur hidupnya?

Orang yang mundur dalam hidupnya adalah orang yang tidak memperdulikan akan halal dan haramnya akan sesuatu perkara itu.

Siapakah orang yang gila itu?

Orang yang gila itu adalah orang yang tidak sembahyang kerana hanya dua syarat saja yang memperbolehkan akan seorang itu meninggalkan sembahyang, pertama sekiranya ia haid dan kedua ketika ia tidak siuman akalnya.

Siapakah orang yang rugi?

Orang yang rugi adalah orang yang sudah sampai usia pertengahan namun masih berat untuk melakukan ibadat dan amal-amal kebaikkan.

Siapakah orang yang selalu ditipu?

Orang yang selalu di tipu adalah orang muda yang menyangka bahawa kematian itu berlaku hanya pada orang tua.

Siapakah orang yang mempunyai rumah yang paling luas?

Orang yang mempunyai rumah yang paling luas adalah orang yang mati membawa amal amal kebaikan di mana kuburnya akan di perluaskan saujana mata memandang.

Siapakah orang yang mempunyai rumah yang sempit lagi dihimpit?

Orang yang mempunyai rumah yang sempit adalah orang yang mati tidak membawa amal-amal kebaikkan lalu kuburnya menghimpitnya.

Kenalilah Diri kamu Rata2 Nescaya Engkau Akan Mengenali Tuhan Yang
Amat Nyata .....

ini pesanan dan peringatan untuk diri saya sendiri dan anda sekalian...

harap dapat diterima dengan hati yang terbuka...

Forwarded by MS

Monday, June 29, 2009

Whisper from the heart....

There are something that should havent been so stormy
There are something that have been so confusing
There are something that cannot be adjusted
There are some moment that cant be change or folded

I see no way of regtreting
I see no way of turning
I see no way of lying

The reality states the truth, what's been done and what's not.

No fault of being a loving person
No fault of being an honest person
No fault of being a loyal person
No fault of being a thouhgtful person

That everytime i felt like leaving,
That every tears that drops daily,
That every feelings that bleed,
That every heart that tears apart

I keep on breathing, surviving
I keep on praying
I keep on believing
I keep on forgiving,

Every steps you take
Every single mistakes
Every hurt you made
Every love you gave

Is the love from Allah
Is the love i need to take care of
Because i really love you, duniya akhirah

If i fly high, i wanted you to fly highier too
If i success, i wanted you to success too
If I'm happy, i need you to have all hapiness in this world
If I live, dear Allah, i really need him with me....


A chance...

...when light meets the rain..."


Friday, June 26, 2009

Internal Conflict

i feel too empty this few days, as i browse through facebook's quizzes to make me a bit happier,...i just discovered a few things in me..

Answer : 85% that he IS THE ONE
Description : He's a keeper. Treasure the moments you two spend together and you
will soon find yourself at the launch of an extraordinary experience.

If only what stated is so true...I'm not sure how he felt about me the days we're together.But in me i just feel that he is being himself. A strong person that really tried his best for our good.But only Allah knows.

Answer :100% in love(soulmates)

If only there's more option in the answer list, i thought of choosing,..INFINITY.
Infinity in love with him.SMQASY.

Answer : 110% in love with you

I can see that too,when my thought flashes back into the past. I'm just not sure why things turn bad later...I love and always love him,InshaAllah...

Answer : You and your partner are 97% compatible

This answer makes me sad...Is there any chances for us to get back together? Dear Allah, please do accept my duas n wishes.Not only me.He once stated that I'm his dream.To be with me.To be the father of my children.That's what he once dreamt of. I hope he never forget it.

5- Relationship Evaluation Quiz
Answer :

I just...missed him T-T

6- What's your soulmate like?
Answer : Your soul mate is sensitive and attentive. He / she takes pleasure in making sure both of you feel comfortable, secure and blissful in the relationship. He / she incorporates all the virtues of being trust-worthy, loyal, and a good listener. You'll find yourself so pampered in the relationship that you would never want to leave.

He once was that person.Its just that he left, with some reason-only he knows.He may have some weakness, but i guess every human made mistakes, learn from mistakes, and improve by time. I just dream of a chance.If ever i made him disapointed, i just hope that he may give me another chance to improve.

7- Is she/he crushing you back?
Answer : He is falling for you

Hope its true. That he never forgets me. Because this love i'm having never faded. The worst part is that, i dont know how to leave, even after you've left. Love you dear.. T-T

8- What love quote are you?
Answer : "Make me immortal with a kiss"
--Christopher Marlowe

Everytime he tried to kiss me,i rejected.But i wanted him to understand, that its not that i dont want pampered him with it, its just that i know i have no legal license to do so-we're not married, and i respect my position.I may hurt Allah by doing so.I believe this love need blessing from survive.InshaAllah.

9- Apakah ciri-ciri pasangan hidup anda?
Answer : bertanggungjwb,penyayang dan beriman

tahniah!!pasangan anda adalah seorang yang bertanggungjwb, mengambil berat, mampu membimbing anda dan mampu menjadi nakhoda rumah tangga yang baik..kerana sifat2 anda ada padanya,,lelaki yang baik adalah untuk wanita yang baik dan sebaliknya...

When i get this answer, my tears do fall.I mean it. Those phrases really do reminds me of you dear. I rememer the first time i fall for you, when i hear your reading the Qunut doa in your Subuh prayer.

10- Calculate BMI
Answer : RESULT
Your BMI is 18. You are Underweight. You should eat more to have an ideal weight.

BMI index cannot be used as a sole method to evaluate someone's health. Please visit your doctor to have a complete evaluation of your health.
This BMI calculator is only suitable for adults.

If only i could add more my weight to reach my normal one.I loose to many after breaking up.My body is responding to my emotional state now i guess.I'm happy but i miss a really big thing now.Him.

I was never this stress before. I was never this unclear with where i'm going to.I was never having this complication. This love ever since i met, teaches me to be honest and loyal.This love i ever since i met, really put in a serious and detail desicion. I'm really drown in it. This conflict i really am,having it,inside....

Owh Allah! I prayed for my sakinah to come back one day.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Madad Ya Rasulallah =)

Diriwayatkan didalam Shahih Bukhari, Allah Swt berfirman didalam hadits qudsiy, ketika salah seorang hamba berbuat dosa lantas ia beristighfar dan bertaubat kepada Allah. Allah Swt berfirman 15.53 “fa’alima abdiy anna lahu Rabban yaghfiruudzzunuuba wa ya’khudz bih, ghafartu li ‘abdiy” hamba-Ku, ia tahu setelah ia berbuat dosa, ia menyesal pada-Ku. Dialah (Allah) yang paling dekat kepada kita, Cintanya paling setia kepada kita, Kasih Sayang-Nya terindah kepada kita. Kita mengenal Kasih Sayang-Nya muncul setiap saat dan kejap. Buktinya adalah kehidupan kita yang itu semua bukti Cintanya Allah. Namun ketika kita mengkhianati Allah dengan dosa dan kesalahan maka ketika sang pengkhianat ini beristighfar memohon pengampunan-Nya, Sang Maha Baik menjawab “hamba-Ku tahu ada Tuhan yang selalu mengampuninya, ia mengenal Kasih Sayang-Ku, Ku-maafkan hamba-Ku”.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

ayat-ayat hikmah

Tidaklah seorang muslim tertusuk duri atau yang lebih dari itu, melainkan ditetapkan baginya dengan sebab itu satu derajat dan dihapuskan pula satu kesalahan darinya”. (HR. Muslim no. 2572).

Tidaklah menimpa seorang mukmin rasa sakit yang terus menerus, kepayahan, penyakit, dan juga kesedihan, bahkan sampai kesusahan yang menyusahkannya, melainkan akan dihapuskan dengan dosa-dosanya”. (HR. Muslim no. 2573).

Tourette Syndrome

I just need some spirit or at least a reason that could light up my life....Last night i watched a movie of a Nursery teacher who has Tourette syndromme(which they produces sounds like a duck), in his last speech when awarded the Teacher of the Year, saying, the best teacher i ever had, "My Tourette".
With love, i coud strive even harder, but without love, i felt being paralysed.I just need a strength for me to be strong to face the world and the future.At the same time,i still have him in this heart. But maybe i should try not to think too much of him.Praying is enough.I just need strength dear Allah. And only you know everything, what's going to happen next, or the hikmah of yesterdays, hopefully tomorrow is going to be a day with rahmah and blessing for both our family.Ameen.InshaAllah.


Ku serah segala ketentuan
Biarlah masa yang berbicara
Dipangku wajah yang layu
Dan aku telah jemu

Aku tidak mahu berpaling
Pada yang mengganggu dan menggugat
Sapanya meletihkan diri
Hadirnya mengundang penat

Akan ku serah cinta ini
Bukan lagi pada manusia
Kerana cinta martabat itu
Bersalut segunung kepalsuan
Dan kepuraan

Aku semakin tidak peduli
Apa yang mungkin akan terjadi
Kerana gerak dan tindakanku
Mahu bebas dari masalah

Ku serahkan cinta ini
Hanya padaMu, oh Tuhan

Akan ku serah cinta ini
Bukan lagi pada manusia
Kerana cinta martabat itu
Bersalut segunung kepalsuan
Dan kepuraan

Aku adalah aku sekarang
Biar terbuang tetap berjuang
Akan ku serahkan jiwa ini
Sepenuh hati dengan keikhlasan
Aku adalah aku yang sekarang
Ku serahkan cinta ini

Grant me sakinah dear Allah.


Monday, June 22, 2009


I misses.......


Sunday, June 21, 2009

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

I take the test in facebook on What type of disorder do i have? and i came out with this answer : OCD Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

OCD: You have odd obsessions that you cannot seem to control. You may even perform rituals to make you feel better. Counting and continuously obsessing over things happens frequently. The typical OCD sufferer performs tasks (or compulsions) to seek relief from obsession-related anxiety. To others, these tasks may appear odd and unnecessary. But for the sufferer, such tasks can feel critically important, and must be performed in particular ways to ward off dire consequences and to stop the stress from building up.

Well, yes...maybe logically i came from a capricornean astrological team(9th January), which, capricorn has the traits/characteristics of:

1=The spiritual goal is to learn to understand the feelings and needs of other people.
2=Inside anyone who has strong Capricornean influences is a person who worries about security -- physical, social, and emotional. A typical Capricorn cannot bear to be embarrassed in public.
3=Sometimes, Capricorn longs to let go a little and to allow themselves to join in on the fun -- let their toes tap in time with the music. But usually a sense of duty and a terrible fear of looking foolish stop them from acting out their desires.
4=Capricorns are also secret romantics who want a perfect and secure love in their lives.
5=has strong Capricornean influence will tend to take life seriously.
6=She seeks a partner who has a good, secure position in life already. She is more likely to make a bad choice of partner than the male Capricorn, but she will soon recognize her mistake.
7=In business, Capricorn women do not often choose other women as partners.
8=If the partner, in marriage or business, is lost through death or similar misfortune, Capricorns of both sexes find it hard to replace the partner and will tend to draw within themselves.
9=To Capricorn, love is the source of all inspiration. Shy, awkward with the opposite sex, and very much private people, Capricorns are, nevertheless, deeply interested in love and are reputed to be the most capable and loyal of lovers.
Capricorn in love will have many of the characteristics listed below.

Behavior When In Love
The typical Capricorn:
* is slow to make approaches and never flirts for fun
* only says "I love you" when it is meant and does not see any reason to keep repeating it
* may worry about the emotional aspect of the relationship
* must feel financially secure to enjoy love
* is caring, considerate, and committed to the loved one
The typical Capricorn expects:
* to be taken seriously
* to make a long-term committment
* faithfulness
* privacy
* to make a home and a family
* to be admired by the loved one

Thru this arcticle i found, i just understand the nature of me and the logical state of having the OCD now.i know myself quite well,which, capricorn plans her life quite well,with detail spot of aims in future planning.But i came to see that, my point of strength(love) is no longer with me. The rapid loss makes me a bit unhappy with life.Just missing someone who's truely important.

I just want to state that, only by completing it, i'll feel much better and happier as a capricorn, in life,i'll be the most happiest person, thus,could help me upgrading myself.InshaAllah, Allah knows me better. And Allah knows that LOVE is my weakest point.and he put me in such condition to test my belief and my Imaan to Him. I shall take it positively and hope that Allah gives me strength to go through this hardness in the most respectfull manner as a Caliph of Allah.InshaAllah.May Allah be with me. And protect him too.

Please Allah,if this pain to be soooo hard for me,please at least give me the sakinah so that i can stand strong facing it.
And please Allah,show me the correct path that i should go through,because only you know the best for everyone.
If being with him is the best, give me strength to always pray for us.
If being with someone else is better for me, show me the way to forget him.



Saturday, June 20, 2009


Allah Allah Allah Ya ALlah...
may peace be upon me,
may Allah lights my way through,
that when i feel weak of what i think of doing it right,
Allah may come and tell me that everything will be alright.

I see nothing wrong to love a person sincerely,
I see no wrong to be loyal,
I see no harm of putting some hope in some faith i have,
May ALlah be with me,
May ALlah hears me,
May Allah bless me..

SubhanaALlah, may peace be upon me,may peace be upon him to.
Let us both be in your guidance.Ameen..


Thursday, June 18, 2009

It's him..=)

I met him. In his page.he updated about 2 weeks ago.well,to me it's good enough to see him updating the account. I'll be sadder if he really think of throwing away the account.Because the accounts really reminds him of me..

Alhamdulillah when i see him updating, i felt a bit happier.

He post a shoutout : "For the love of God"
inshaAllah dear, my support is with you.Always. =)
The thing that make me smile is that, he didn't delete any of the pictures i editted for him, with a tag NbNozinLovesU at below right.
His profile picture, the one i editted for him with a sign, " he's a very shy guy"..Alhamdulillah he still left it there,as usual.
And the secret code we have...he stil keep it too.Ameen.

May Allah leads his way. I really love him. And hope that he really loves me too.

Dear ALlah, please do always protect him wherever he goes, whatever he do,,stay beside him and show him when he's wrong.Sent my sakinah to him.Peace be upon me too,Ameen..


The Confession

I was reading an article written : Reflection of Heaven’s Rose ( when i realised how much i've change,as a person, as a woman in His eye. It states how Fatima Az-zahra the beloved daughter of Prophet Muhammad(SAW) perform her life as a Muslim, having faith to Allah the AlMighty, as an obeyfull daughter of the prophet, as a wife and mother, and as in total, a great woman of example for each and every sisters in Islam.

Thinking myself too deep.From where did i came wrong.From which phase have i been neglecting my purpose of life, as a chaliph of Allah,...
with an objective of life, to be an honoured man in the eye of the creator of all creator, Allah br one of them who are choosen to be guaranteed be place in Heaven..the utmost future.After duniya, after barzakh, after akhirah...

Before, i know i was a very strong girl,holding tight to my belief, any obstacles comes along i could strictly handle it with my understanding in Islam. But Allah knows me more as a human, my point of strength which He knew would be the time He could examine my Imaan.

::THE LOVE.THE RAINBOW::the light meets the rain::

LOVE. Love to another human.A point of strength to know whether, this girl could be a much more stronger girl, or which this girl would lost her Imaan during the duniyawi test. She at first fall in love to this guy, the first time he recite his Qunut Doa' early subuh. She felt, hope and prayed..If only this guy is the one who'll be the Imaam in her and her childrens' solat.She melted for his reading of surah in the Quran, and when he set his prayer. It was a very beautiful setting that early subuh. At school he is the one who always reminds people to stop doing work to perform solat,she sees him as a very loud speaker, potential to be a very good father, a good leader in teaching her Islam, in providing her and her children knowledge, brings her nearer to Allah's path,guiding the family in both duniyawi and ukhrawi. A very soft-hearted person, i believe, he once was caught by her, with tear falling down his cheek when he sees the sunset, the beauty of Allah's creation. She's relieved,he has a very beautiful heart. When they are apart, he always reminds her to perform solah, remember always to set prayers, to have sholawat to the Rasul. There was once, he is very mad,she's not sure why, and she just dont know what to do at that time.They are on phone, which she cant calm him down like she always do when she's around. But his sadness and madness relieved when he whisper his favourite zikrullah,

"Allahumma solli wasaalim 'ala nur al'anwar.wasiiril asrar.watiryaqil aghyar.wamifta hibabilyaasar.saidina wa maulana muhammadinil mukhtar.waa lihil athar.waashabihil akhiyar.'adadani'amillah.waif dha~lih"

Ya Allah, kurniakanlah kebahagiaan dan kesejahteraan kepada cahaya bagi segala cahaya dan rahsia bagi segala rahsia, dan ubat bagi segala penyakit, dan anak kunci bg pintu kesenangan iaitu ialah penghulu kita Muhammad yang terpiih dan keluarganya yang bersih dan sahabat-sahabatnya yang banyak memuat kebajikan sebanyak bilangan ni'mat-ni'matMu dan kelebihanMu.

And some other days they kept themselves in peace and love, having each other hearing each other reciting the words from the Holy Quran. His voice reciting it fluently expose the sincereness and happiness of the love, which the love,connected with blessing from Allah the AlMighty. And hers to,could make him feel peace in mind.

::THE DECLINE::the turebullance::

I'm not sure when the turbulance really blew so harsh that the relationship turns so bad. But i 'm sure why everything turns not in order. The love i mean. Basically it has been ruin due to desires of the duniya(nafsu). I believe he love her much,but sometimes he just need some human touch, holding hands like usually couples do, kissing, hugging, which she know she cant perform without having any licence from Allah. A proper marriage. A stage where they are allowed to do so. She, are also trying hard to defend, her belief that she was taught of,but sometimes, she wasn't strong enough. She prayed,hopefully the guy could really understand.

Not that she dont want to grab his hand tight to her when he touches,
Not that she dont want to reply when he tries to kiss her at the lips,
Not that she dont want to hug him close to her as how he's trying to feel near,
She would really like to hold him tight to her,
She would really want to kiss him back with the sweetest charm,
She would really hug him when he's not looking,...
Its just that she knows by doing so could hurt Allah,
Its just that she understand by doing so she's deceiving her belief,
Its just that she dont want this duniya desires hurt the love which, earlier has the blessing of Allah.
Its just that their bonding now is not that strong to let them do all the desires.
Marriage allows it to be so. A true husband and wife i mean...

I know, if i've let all the desires been done, it'll make me feel cheap as a woman.A woman in Islam shall potery the beauty with respect.
I've read somewhere in a book, Wanita Solehah, Ciri-ciri dan Fungsinya (Jibril AR : 1985: 15)
"..Wanita Yang Solehah adalah wanita cantik yang benar-benar mencintai Allah dan RasulNya dan mencintai semua pencinta-pencinta Allah. Sebaliknya Allah pun mencintai dia.Allah tidak mungkin akan mencintai wanita-wanita yang tidak cantik. Wanita-wanita yang tidak cantik adalah wanita-wanita neraka yang menghambur-hamburkan bencana dan malapetaka di dunia ini.."

They were seperated then due to academic purposes, where she has to be transfered to tha main campus for her final year. What a relieve she thinks,that by having the distance they could at least lessen the sins. But however, distance are also one of the factor. She felt being left out most of the time, when he is being too concentrating with his job. She just need some attention, but he seems to care too much about his. She him and missed him a lot....
At the same time,he slowly falls to a girl he could have spending his daily time with, the girl he could look to everday, the girl that exist infront of him,physically-connected. I see that's the point where everything turns bad.
He has not been concentrating to her anymore.His promises he brokes.His words he forgotten. He started to lie and being dishonest to her which that makes her felt frustrated and sad.Her words has never work to him anymore. Her word seems to creates problem rather than giving him peace and calm like those days.
Because most of the time he sees another option,another chance, her substitute.The unexpected.

::THE THOUGHT::missing the rainbow::

Everytime i think of this, the fall of the relationship seems to bury me deep down. I really honestly sincerely love him from the smallest to the biggest thing in him,
and everytime, i always put him one of the major occasion in life i need to put at the uppermost in any list. Tried to be loyal. Closing and limiting my eyes from looking at others. I loved him. Duniya, akhirah.
With him, we've also plan to get married and have a blessful beautiful and intelligent children. Too many trust i've put in here.Too many love i've risk my life with. Too many sincerity that i couldn't even let him go even after what he did to me.For now, i keep on praying for our best.For Allah to lead both us well under His blessing, keep us healthy physically,emotionally and psychologically.Till one day we shall meet again in a much more proper and respected condition, falls at the right time,..

::THE LESSON::the hope::

=the love with blessing of Allah is the love which when both meets could remind them of Allah, in the most beautiful manner, following the respectful guidance of Islam, for both to have a blessfull relationship and bond between them.

= the hikmah which is hidden under the fall of this relationship ;
Allah wants us to rethink of the sins we made and be regretful.Taubat an-Nasuha.
Allah gives us chance to understand ourself deeper and think about the future,duniya and akhirah matters.
Allah separates us to prevent us from doing any wrongdoings.
Allah give the chance for us to have some peace in mind.
Allah gives us chance to know what is meant by As-sabaruminalImaan. Patience.

=responsibility as a Sayyid dear.Hold your great-great grandfather Muhammad SAW tight to your heart. He's my idol.I hope all his traits potreyed clearly in you.
:: His Siddiq (truthful/honest)
:: His Amamah (trustworthiness/promise keeper)
:: His Tabligh (informativeness)
:: His Fathonah(intelligance)

To me, i just want to say, that DISTANCE should not be a matter, a cause of ruining the relationship. I hope you understand, that the love i have for you aren't only for duniya, but also for akhirah. And like i said before.even you're still alive, or died, i'll still love you and pray for you any time indeed.Because i'm trained by my family to be loyal, honest and sincere. Hope you really see how much i need you,your love, like the once we've had. It's really Islamic, and its really beautiful...... =)

Monday, June 15, 2009

A bright new day =)

Good morning dear.
A bright new day..just pray for peacefulness in this tiny little heart of mine.And his too. Ameen.

I just read somwhere,stated:

First of all, Love Allah the AlMighty,
Second next is to Love Ourselves,
The last third, to Love Someone else

InshaAllah.Even you have told me the same before dear.I'll never forget it.

Have a nice beautiful day dear.Do take care.Ameen.


Barely sleep

I cant sleep tonight.I tried to sleep early and reschedule my body-clock.but seems like it doesnt work. My mind still think of you. I miss you so much dear.just hope that i could appear in your dream like last time.. T-T

Yang, sy tawu sy slalu bwat kamu sedih... xterlintas langsung dlm ati sy nk bwat mcm 2...Ia cuma xsengaje je...Sy pown xtawu cmne boleh jadi mcm 2.cume yang sy tawu sy xnk kehilangan kamu...Sy syg kamu..Sy cume nk hidup bahagia ngan kamu je... s y xde niat nk bg kamu nk kamu happy slalu... sgt syg perlukan kamu dlm hidup ni... luv u so much syg...

In this, i tried to convince myself, that you just lost your path on the way home. Even how long it takes, how hard the obstacles are, I'll just wait until you come back, reaching me safely,my heart(your home).If you lost, just believe me that i'm always with you.wherever you are. I need you badly dear.Forgive me.


A prayer. A hope.

The past few days, I got a surprise. Could say a point of strength, could say a state of hope, but sometimes blurred with curiosity and cowardness. In me. A wave came along.

Dear love, look who’s coming? Its your brother, the one you love, and the one I respect.

I never thought I would have been in such condition to speak with him when everything between you and me are no more like yesterday. Last time, when I’m on phone with you, I only hear him talking slowly beside you, driving carefully at the driver seat. But now, its him, really, speaking to me, as your brother, as a brother to the person i love,while you are not there. I just wish I’ve been introduced to your whole family in a nice and pleasant manner, as a girl you love, and dreaming to be introduced proudly, with pride and love. However, Allah the Al-Mighty knows the best for us now, and forever.

Quoting few lines of his that makes me feel missing you, mixed with sadness and emptiness, hapiness…too many feelings I had at one time. I’m confused what to do,but at the same time I believe in what your brother said. Its so true.

He was asking me whether I like to learn Islam in deeper. Surely YES I answered. Islam is my life. My purpose of life. My goal. I’d do anything to learn more.

Later he asked me, why I didn’t meet you. I answered, it’s not me who’s running away, but its you dear. I tried, but you seem to run more further. What should I do?

“Hm my advice is… keep it up”

Keep on praying, the best will follow then.He said.

My eyes shattered with tears as I’m reading his words. I missed you. I just wish my heart could communicate to yours like in the pastime. I wish my words do work with you, give you calm instead of misery,give you happiness instead of problems.

The biggest word from him is, “You honestly straight to Allah's path... and I’ll help you with him”.

May Allah bless all of us. I hope its more than just a compromise.I hope its a prayer, a blessing, a wish. I feel some blessing, that someone in your family feels the pain I have. I felt the burden a bit lighter now. Somebody hears.But at the end,I hope you hear me more than others do.

That night, I felt so close to you. As like I’m invited to be apart of yours. I feel like your family are trying to know me more.And giving me chance. If only I’ve been presented by you..

This pain, and love, I hope you do understand.

I‘m not the type of girl that when you leave me, I’ll get too angry and delete you easily from my life. I’m the type of girl, when once I’ve given my love to someone, the love shall be seeded for duniya and akhirah. Whether you are alive, or dead, my heart will oweys be there for you, praying you peace, praying for your best, praying for your health, in everything you do, in every steps you take.

Sorry that, I just don’t know how to leave home(you)…

The last miracle phrase from your brother that I’ll never forget…

“Take care of yourself, and your belief(Islam) every day…and from there, will be miracle from Allah SWT”

He, made me believe, that miracles do really exist.once and possibly later.

THE ONLY MIRACLE that happened to me before is HAVING YOU in MY LIFE.

And hopefully, the NEXT MIRACLE would be YOU TO COME BACK TO ME.

Love you dear, more than you ever imagine. More than you ever know.